You don’t have to look too far to find the truth in this title. Open up any social media and you will find someone criticizing someone for something they have posted. It can be as simple as a joke, or a meme. It can be more complex, a belief or God forbid, a political opinion. But instead of scrolling on by, the critic will pounce, not to attempt to inform, but destroy.
These are tough days. Ask any mental health professional and they will say that these are the worst days people have ever faced in their lives. This pandemic and the isolation that goes along with it, are taking people to the breaking point. Sadly, many find it impossible to share their struggles because we live in a “Buck Up Bucko” society. We live in a time when people who do not or cannot understand what others face, belittle them.
Imagine having a full-time job and kids in school starting different hours online. Add the juggling work, homework, teaching lessons and anxiety that children cannot play with friends. Imagine all the “People Persons” isolated in their houses, who lack friendly hugs, coffee, lunches, and church. Imagine seniors who do not understand why their families do not come, why they cannot have a haircut, why they are alone. Imagine having college students taking their classes remotely and missing out on the fun of college life, missing on meeting prospective spouses, making important connections with professors who could advance their careers someday. Now imagine that you are unable to share your frustrations because you have had negative experiences with people who think you just need to deal with it all.
All of the people above are in a battle. Maybe the critics aren’t. President Theodore Roosevelt said it best about those in the midst of battle and the critics:
“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows, in the end, the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat”.
If you are in the battle, the credit belongs to you, not the one who is on the sidelines pointing out what they think you could do better. Every person working, teaching their child, attending college remotely, trying to stay connected is in a worthy cause. The days may be chaotic, but getting up each day and getting back at it is a victory. Being in the arena is tough. It is at times thankless. After the battle is over, the rewards are great, win or lose. Staying in the arena and not quitting is what makes us stronger, better.
Do not listen to the critics. Anyone can be a one. It takes a strong person to hold their tongue. It takes someone willing to extend grace, willing to be polite and thoughtful in the way they behave and speak.
“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen”. (Ephesians 4:29)
If you lead a battle that takes you down, time and time again, there is help.
Call 911 if you or someone you know is in immediate danger or go to the nearest emergency room.
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
Call 1-800-273-TALK (8255); En español 1-888-628-9454
Use Lifeline Chat on the web
The Lifeline is a free, confidential crisis service that is available to everyone 24 hours a day, seven days a week. The Lifeline connects people to the nearest crisis center in the Lifeline national network. These centers provide crisis counseling and mental health referrals.
IT'S A HARnDen LIFE... 